You know how you can go through life seeing many, many things you've never seen before, but they don't really make you stop and wonder? They're small things, or odd combos of things, but they don't really make you pause for more than a second... The thing I saw today was not one of those things... Today's thing was one of those makes you stop and say, "I can't say I've ever seen this before and come to think of it, I'm glad I haven't seen this before because I'm not liking this."
Grizzled and I were up at our rental house the other day. It's a house that Grizzled bought long before I met him and over the years he decided to keep it and rent it out. We tried to sell it a couple years ago, but were irked with the offers and the unreasonable requests so back to renting we went. We tried to sell it again this year and kicked ourselves for not taking some of the unreasonable offers from a couple of years ago... So anyhow, we're searching for renters again. We've never had trouble getting a renter, but this time has been a bit more challenging. We both went up to meet with a couple and to do some yardwork/cleaning etc. The house has been vacant for the past 3 months and even though no one is in it, it still needs some attention. It was dusty. The floors needed to be cleaned. The fridge was growing something even though it was empty and on.
After wiping down the fridge, I figured I'd look in the freezer. This is a basic fridge that has the freezer in the top so I wasn't expecting much extraneous crud. I didn't think much could grow in there since it was running. I didn't expect to find anything in there. I certainly didn't expect to find what I found. It wasn't even that obvious at first... and then I saw them.
Hairs.
Lots of black hairs, and they appeared to be animal hairs... about 2 1/2 inches long... I didn't think much when seeing the first one, or even the second or third, but it was when my eyes scanned the freezer and the inside of the freezer door that I saw at least 30 hairs! It was then that I realized, hairs have no place in a freezer! I live with animals and hairy people, I know hairs end up everywhere, but I can honestly say I've never seen hair in my freezer. It was wrong.
I scanned my memory for the type of dog the former renter had... a Weimereiner. No, these hairs did not come from a Weimereiner. I knew his girlfriend had a dog... a German Shepard. I suppose these could have come from one, but they seemed a little too fine.
Now we weren't renting to Bill Frist so I'm guessing the guy wasn't storing future anatomy projects in there, but still... it looked really wrong. Hair should not be in the freezer... Grizzled thinks they just used a rag to wipe it out that had been used elsewhere and the hairs were transferred that way. I could see that... kind of... but still, I would think the sight of leftover hairs in a freezer might make you realize you need to use something else to clean those out.
I'm still not 100% satisfied with that answer... I'm still wondering about rabid raccoons needing to be saved until the lab could check their brains... or wondering about the cat that accidentally jumped in behind the owner's back and was closed in for the rest of it's shortened life.
The only thing I'm 100% sure about? I never want to see scattered hairs in a freezer again.
Perhaps someone was a wig-wearer and wanted to stay cool on a hot summer day?
Posted by: Brando | October 07, 2010 at 04:50 PM
You should live in Wisconsin. MUCH worse things have been discovered in freezers up here.
Posted by: zombie rotten mcdonald | October 07, 2010 at 05:16 PM
I have never been able to bring myself to eat at a ground-meat restaurant calling itself Burger Wisconsin.
Posted by: herr doktor bimler | October 07, 2010 at 07:48 PM
I had an excellent burger at a place in Whitewater.
Judging from the map, it was Hammers Hometown Tap. Although the name doesn't ring a bell at the moment.
~
Posted by: ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© | October 07, 2010 at 08:20 PM
It is this kind of discovery that led man to creating toxic vengeance!!
Posted by: Miss Jane | October 08, 2010 at 04:20 AM
Have you ruled out the possibility that they were spider legs?
Posted by: herr doktor bimler | October 08, 2010 at 05:12 AM
HDB - HAHAHAHAAA
This post gave me the heeby-jeebies.
Bleh.
I shudder.
Posted by: Von | October 08, 2010 at 10:37 AM
It was just Alex
He has branched out to pina coladas.
Posted by: fish | October 08, 2010 at 12:42 PM
Whoops. broken tag.
Posted by: fish | October 08, 2010 at 12:43 PM
I can't think of Alex without thinking of a bizarre story involving a boob and a liquor salesman. Maybe that was two boobs...
Posted by: Jennifer | October 08, 2010 at 12:46 PM
I can't think of Alex without thinking of a bizarre story involving a boob and a liquor salesman. Maybe that was two boobs...
Do go on....
Posted by: Brando | October 08, 2010 at 02:32 PM
Isn't this the way that Stephen King stories begin?
Posted by: Dan Leo | October 08, 2010 at 04:59 PM
I bet bimler could work a spider tangent into any post.
Von- me too.
Brando- it's better left to the imagination. :)
Dan- Exactly.
Posted by: Jennifer | October 09, 2010 at 11:27 AM
Not sure why I should have to clean-shave a head before I store it in the freezer. Looks unnatural.
Posted by: Substance McGravitas | October 09, 2010 at 05:09 PM
I can't think of Alex without thinking of a bizarre story involving a boob and a liquor salesman
Alex, you better be drinking your water...
Posted by: fish | October 11, 2010 at 09:42 AM
clean-shave a head before I store it in the freezer. Looks unnatural.
BBBB must find your aesthetic preference vastly reassuring.
Posted by: herr doktor bimler | October 11, 2010 at 02:27 PM
He has eyebrows!
Posted by: Substance McGravitas | October 12, 2010 at 09:25 PM