Casting a pall

A student at EL's school decided he was done. He took his life last week. He was not a friend of EL's, but kids in her classes knew him and said he seemed "normal". I've had brushes with this before. I lost a cousin to suicide. I lost a good family friend to suicide. I've had dark days when the thought entered my own head, but thankfully, it never lingered.

I don't know what it is about this particular boy... perhaps it's having kids around the same age, but it just makes me sick. No one should have to feel that alone, that hurt, that done... especially someone who should have everything ahead of them. I know it's hard to see ahead when you haven't had enough life yet to realize life moves on, but still, it just breaks my heart to think of a child as feeling that bad... and I can't even imagine what his parents must be feeling. There will never be enough answers, that I know... even as things come to light in the days to come. There will never be enough answers.

In the meantime, I hug my lamblets, and thank the powers that be that they seem happy and I pray to whomever, or whatever will listen, that they always will be... and will never hurt as much as that poor boy... and that if they do, that I'll know they're not feeling "normal" and will be able to help.

Comments

[Another Kiwi]

Yeah, I always feel a bit guilty about how our kids have such a good life with love from everyone around them. We keep telling them that they can talk to us about everything and tell them about other people that they can talk to if they don't feel comfortable with us. But you never can, for absolutely sure, know if it is enough.

[Jennifer]

No, you never can, and that's a scary thing.

[blue girl]

So sad.

[ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®©]

I know what you mean by the 'dark days'.

They seemed much worse back in college, even though looking back things were never as bleak as they sometimes were later 'in real life'.
~

[fish]

I thankfully have not been close to a suicide since my jr high days. It is truly jarring to think of someone becoming that alienated from the world.

[scribbler50]

Truly heartbreaking and far too prevalent, which makes me wonder if that prevalence isn't a big part of the problem. It's self-perpetuating. Meaning... because at that age kids are often peer driven, moved to do what they see other kids doing, perhaps something as desperate and insane as suicide as an "out" seems an option. They see it elsewhere and identify with those who'd suffered their isolation. A peer link-up.

Though I'm sure it happened somewhere, I can't remember hearing of a teen suicide when I was that age. Ever. But there also wasn't an Internet then for kids to (a) read about the prevalence and decide on taking that route, or (b) be a victim of the online harassment which is often the source of why these kids feel ostracized. Kids, as we know, can be cruel and to be able to be cruel anonymously with some scathing e-mail is even more tempting. The whole thing is so tragic it almost unspeakable. My heart goes out to the parents of these lost souls.

[Jennifer]

Perhaps it is more prevalent because people hear more about it and it does become an option... or the only options because they think they have no others.

As I said though... the thought that someone has come to this makes me sick... especially someone so young. Of course there has been an outpouring of support, as one would hope, but I can't help but wonder where the support was before. People need support before it gets to the desperation point and they either kill themselves or lash out and kill someone else.

[scribbler50]

Amen!

[Brando]

I am very sorry to hear that, especially with someone so young. I agree with fish, it just slams into you when you hear about a young person killing themselves.