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April 29, 2008

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Whew. I'll have to think about this and what I should say about it. This has been weighing on my mind too. I'm hoping it passes.

We just dial down the posting but leave the door open. I really like seeing people around and hearing people's funny comments. I wish everyone could be like Snag, but we're not. If it feels like a job, don't do it. I didn't want to close up 3B because I feel responsible for out little community, but it seems to do OK without us being a hub, but I feel like we nurtured that little hub for a long time and don't want to see it all grown up. There are so many snorkles that have to be snorked still, and chili dogs for those so inclined. I can't let it go, because part of me doesn't want to. I want that fun feeling back, and I want to see Snag eat a moose.

Hey, Jen, you know I love to write, but believe it or not I'm also a big fan of not writing when I have nothing to say. Here are some lines from a poem called "so you want to be a writer" by Charles Bukowski:

if it doesn't come bursting out of you
in spite of everything
don't do it.
unless it comes unasked out of your
heart and your mind and your mouth
and your gut,
don't do it.
if you have to sit for hours
staring at your computer screen
or hunched over your
typewriter
searching for words.
don't do it...

if you have to sit there and
rewrite it again and again,
don't do it.
if it's hard work just thinking about doing it,
don't do it.
if you're trying to write like somebody
else,
forget about it.
if you have to wait for it to roar out of
you,
then wait patiently.
if it never does roar out of you,
do something else...

unless the sun inside you is
burning your gut,
don't do it...

There are voices I would miss.

Like I miss Billmon.

Like I miss Fafnir and Giblets.

Holy shit, I miss Steve Gilliard.

Like I miss As The Apple Turns.

Everything comes and goes though, and ephemerality is what gives life its spice and urgency,

But whose spelling would I correct....

There is a malaise in the air. The anti-spring.

I think of the blogs like peoples front porches. Either the lights are on and you're invited for a cool glass of tea and repartee, or the lights are off and you're out of luck.

I think that you can't judge value or contribution based on one blog. It's the stew of posts on one blog, comments on another, posts about comments on a third blog, talks with spouses off line about what we read today, and private thoughts where we make connections a week later that we never would've thought of otherwise.

I like the porch thing, mdh.

Cuz I'm the crazy old guy who sits on his front porch and yells at the kids to stay offa my grass.

Occasionally shooting at squirrels.

....maybe I shouldn't wonder why I don't get more visitors.

Pinko, I want to eat a moose too.

Flippancy aside, I need to think about this some too.

I would like to add that UC and myself are identical in almost every measurable way. I think UC makes more typos but that is all. Therefore, it is utterly effortless to comment and assume my favourite (and only) persona.

UC is a dream kitten. :)

I have been where you are, only about a year ago. The result is a blog on which I post approximately once a month for the sake of form. I am much more at ease as a commenter at other people's blogs.

Part of the problem is, of course, my whole stealth mode thing that robs me of a heck of a lot of things to write about. I haven't decided whether or not to drop the stealth mode, since enough people on teh internets have a general idea of who I am, where I live, what I do. With stealth mode, I'm largely confined to blogging about serious pants topics and food. That makes blogging like work a little too often. I used to have a shtick and nice market where I would reinterpret Québec politics to anglo-Canadians, considering that too few anglophones in Canada can read Le Devoir. But even that became like work, and I didn't get the validating attention at the time that I needed.

If I drop stealth mode and just talk about my life, it might be a lot more fun to do, and I might do it more often. But I'm still too paranoid to do that.

Snag is not allowed to stop. If I die in a plane crash, I will have GC convince our hypothetical zygotes that that is their uncle Snag. They will visit for three months a year.

So are we stopping the talk of stopping now?

For the record, I enjoy reading your blog.

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