Of course his posts consist of lots of writing. Mine, as of late, have not... and still won't today. I'll use someone else's.
You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. ... You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting over and over announcing your place in the family of things.
Still trying to catch up from time lost last week. Somehow we've come to the end of another week... I'm not sure if ground was lost or gained.
Insurance has been a frustration this week. Not a surprise I guess. It was announced last December that our health insurance premiums would be raised 30%... They've gone up consistently over the past decade, but this was by far, the biggest jump. Our annual premiums are now solidly in the 5 figure range. Our annual family deductible is now definitely in the 5 figure range. All in all, we're a fairly healthy bunch, but we still keep paying more and more with less and less assurance that when it's needed, they'll actually come through.
We applied for a different plan, one that cut out some of the bells and whistles that Grizzled's employer had to offer due to size of the staff, but found out we were denied. Well, 3 of us were. Again, I wasn't totally surprised. The Eldest Lamblet has been dealing with a chronic issue for the past decade. I was pretty sure that one would get us tossed out from the start, but still, we tried. We filled out reams of paperwork, underwent very, very, very lengthy phone interviews that were incredibly frustrating in that the same question would be asked 7 different ways... usually for something that had happened 7 or more years ago, even though only the past 3 years were supposed to make a difference. It was exhausting and frustrating. I'll never forget hearing the interviewing Dr telling me that "idiopathic" was not on her list of words therefore it didn't count as part of a diagnosis, she needed a better diagnosis. Strangely enough, it turned up in the refusal letter...
Grizzled was refused for an out and out lie. Their reason for his refusal was 100% not accurate. The reason did not exist, but there it was.
I was refused because at some point in the past two years, I discovered my vitamin D levels were low. That was rectified by taking an over the counter vitamin D supplement. Extreme, I know. But there it was, "Applicant has had a vitamin D deficiency of unknown cause." Unknown cause?? What's the big mystery? I live in a frickin' northern city that is lucky if it gets sun for half the year, let alone the proper angle of sun, the right amount of sun, etc. Also, I'm pale and have been warned about the dire need to slather myself in sunblock lest I get skin cancer.
The youngest lamblet was welcomed with open arms! If you want affordable health insurance, you need to be 9... although, convincing them she was healthy was also a work of epic proportions. She'd had an echocardiogram when she was younger... her pediatrician thought she heard a heart murmur. The lamblet was fine. The insurance Dr who was interviewing me said... in many ways... many times, "So, she's cured of her heart condition??" I said, "SHE NEVER HAD A HEART CONDITION!" And then said it every way I could so that test would not be a pox upon her life.
We're lucky though. We're still insured with Grizzled's firm. We'll just pay more... and more... and more... and more... And at some point, they'll probably deny me because I'm pale... a preexisting condition...
On to happier rambles...
--raw carrots still give me the hiccups. I love raw carrots. I chew my carrots carefully, but cannot get through a carrot without getting the hiccups. It usually only takes one bite. I probably shouldn't admit this. It can probably be used against me during future insurance interviews...
-- there was the vague pre-odor of spring in the air this morning. While spring is my least favorite season, I also realize it's a needed transition. If I get any say, I'd like a dryish, flowery, mellow spring... no endless gray, muddy, soppy spring. Please! Be gentle with me, spring!!! And even if it's a dryish, flowery, mellow spring, I know I'll still find the cold wafting off of the ground and surrounding buildings unnerving as it melds with warmer air. I prefer the cool air/warm buildings that fall brings. The reversal reminds me too much of a tomb... Yes, spring makes me think of death, whereas fall makes me think cozy, life-affirming thoughts. Go figure...
I could continue to ramble, but won't. Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! If you get a chance, stop by Riddled, Another Kiwi has posted another of his wonderful poems. As usual, I liked it, and it didn't give me the hiccups.
A week or so ago, when the normal filters were down, the sun was shining in, and I was revved up with coffee, I put up a post about artistic endeavors, failings, and victories. There were many wonderful comments with an unexpected one coming in from Another Kiwi.
post Jennifer! All my life I have known that I could write and have
treated as you describe, sort of a hobby that one has enthusiasm for
intermittently. It is only in the last two years that I have started to
do anything about it and by my standards I have been successful though it
has cost my more money than it will ever make me, ever. But I have two
poems that I wrote that I love and two short stories the same. Lots of
wreckage in between them, of course.
Power to your painting.
I love comments like that and not just because it said, "Great post Jennifer"... I like it because I believe we've all got a hell of a lot more going on than we usually show. I usually see Another Kiwi's comments over here (no, he doesn't have a blog, or if he does... he's not sharing)... he's bawdy as heck and I appreciate that, but who knew there was a poet lurking beneath the bawd and the quit wit?!?! I asked him if he'd be willing to share... said I'd post them if he liked. Well, what do you know... the poems arrived today. I'll save my commentary for the comments... He already saw my commentary in an email.