Saying yes...

Thought for the Day

      When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands       explained.

-Mark Twain

One more thought- this one my own and not as eloquent as Mr. Twain... Daffodils smell happy.

There's a light at the end of this viral tunnel...

This morning is the first morning since 3/14 where I have woken up and actually felt like health might be my co-pilot. It's been an up and down route for the past 10 or so days. Some days were a total loss, some days gave the illusion of wellness being around the corner. But today... today I feel like I might actually have oxygen circulating in my brain again and although I'm far from being springy, I don't feel quite as much like death on a soda cracker.

One should never underestimate the benefits of oxygen and health for clear thinking. Oh sure, I may have thought I was constructing normal sentences over the past week or so, but looking back with a newly clear mind, I realize the light may have been on, but no one was home.

I'm guilty of poor thinking when distracted, tired, or sick. Grizzled has been a witness to many mind-boggling comments to come out of my mouth when in these situations. They kind of scare him since he believes he married a capable, thinking person.

This past week only added to my cache of "Oh no... did I say that out loud?!?" comments and while they made perfect sense to me at the time, I know they'll be used to tease me for some time to come.

These thoughts rank right up there with the dreaded time I asked aloud in the car which gas station had a shell for a logo. Hey, I was distracted... and tired...

This week, topping the list of insane comments caused by the viral plague are, me telling Grizzled not to throw out the Sunday paper (I was in bed for most of Sunday ) because Easter fell on a Sunday this year and I wanted to see what was in it!

The other topper of the week would have been when I was slumped on the couch, trying to watch something with Grizzled, when an ad for Two and a Half Men came on with a very busty woman and a leering Charlie Sheen and I said something to the effect of, "I wonder if men liked breasts before advertising became so overt or if advertising caused it... I mean, I wonder it there was any interest in them before boobs were put in our faces!?!"

Grizzled calmly responded... "Oh no... men have never been interested in breasts in their faces before advertising told them to be. For centuries, men haven't cared the least about breasts... only recently...".

I'm feeling better though and think I can actually think. If any nonsensical comments were left at any of your places over the past 10 days, I was not myself... I do believe though that logic and oxygen have returned.

I'll be insane, but by God, our electricity bill will be lower!!!

We recently signed up for "real time electricity". Instead of paying a flat rate all the time, you are actually charged for the amount of electricity you use and at what time you use it. It pays to do your laundry or run a load of dishes during off hours if you can plan accordingly. Since I'm the one who is around more often than not, this is going to fall to me to chart and plan.

I can tell already, I'll be insane soon.

I do not suggest it for anyone who likes to gamble or who might be slightly obsessive-compulsive. You have to look at a graph and see if you can schedule your peak appliance usage for the lowest predicted price per day. Our average price per kilowatt hour was 7.5 cents before switching so I’m supposed to be watching this graph and doing laundry, etc, at a time that is ideally below 7.5. They give predicted hourly rates, but today the low rates were off by 4 cents! Yes, I’m going to be insane before this is all over. Our bill will be lower, but I’ll be like the rat in the Skinner Box pushing the lever for one more inexpensive pellet only to get zapped again and again!!!! AHHHHHH!

I have a feeling the reason you save money is because you never run anything because you're too busy hanging out at the WattSpot waiting for that ideal price. We're currently at 8.1 so I guess the laundry can wait for another hour...

ATPCT: Sometimes you just show up

I had to go to painting class yesterday. I did not want to go. I really haven't wanted to go for awhile... not totally sure why, but yesterday I had to go. I had taken the previous week off due to illness and I knew that had probably thrown my group into a tizzy. As a matter of fact, I knew it did when I started receiving calls 30 minutes before class was to start as to why I wasn't there. Cancellation calls had been made, a sign had been put up, but that didn't matter. There's a routine and I was messing with it so yesterday, come hell or high water, I had to go.

I had absolutely nothing planned. I still have not found my groove in that respect. There are those who just want to use it as studio time and I am fine with that, but there are a number of others who want an exercise, a demonstration... there are those who are hoping I will tell them how to do what they have not been able to figure out for the past 50+ years. I hope and pray every week that I'll find the magic answer, but I know there isn't one.

I was searching for the magic answer yesterday, wondering what to do since we had gotten off of the schedule and I knew people would not be coming in prepared. I spouted this out to my sister who suggested I just show up and let them know that sometimes showing up is the best you can do. At least if you show up, something can and might happen. It may not be what you expected, but at least the chance is there, so... I showed up.

It was a smaller class yesterday which was nice. The class is too big for anything truly meaningful to happen. Sometimes I think the class is too set in its way for any meaningful thing to happen. I'm not even sure why I feel I am supposed to make something meaningful happen. It's not in the course description. "Explore the world of oil painting! Work with shadows and light! During every class, something meaningful will happen. For an additional $25, you'll get twice as much meaning out of every class!!" And yet I feel the onus of creating meaningfulness. Maybe I just want it for myself.

Yesterday's class wasn't all struggle. I had some good discussions, we had some good laughs. One of the people is moving into an assisted living situation. She doesn't want to, but her children don't want her living alone any longer. The other students keep telling her how she'll love it, how she'll probably meet a lot of men. She said she's done with men. Men to her just make her think of stinky socks. I told her she'd probably find even more men since she wasn't looking. I suggested we start a pool to see who could come the closest to picking the date she met someone and their age. She said although she's not looking, she'd prefer younger.

Yesterday's class was OK. It was neither good nor bad. I doubt anything miraculous happened. No... yesterday, I just showed up.

It's Project Runway Night, People!!!

Yes, Wednesday is upon us already and I'll be at the helm over at newcritics, live-blogging this tantalizing season of Project Runway. You know you want to be there. You know you do. Something has been missing from your life and you're thinking this is probably it. Well, you're right!

Besides, this season has been known to induce narcolepsy in its viewers. I'm coming down with a cold and will need all the snark I can get in order to stay awake.

You know the drill... live-blogging down in the comments (wasn't that a Billy Joe Royal song? "Down in the Comments") over at newcritics. 10/9pm.

Who wants to be the winner???

Update: The winner will be chosen solely by judging their entries. That's the way it always was and should be. I was merely trying to fill some time until AG gets her ducks in a row. It was also a ploy for comments! Hey, you can't blame a gal for trying!! Anyhow, as I've said before to all of those who've asked, most of the numbers have been crunched, we're just waiting on some final number crunching and perhaps one lost package. You've all been patient, but unfortunately only time will tell.

On a purely selfish note- all moose references were enjoyed and appreciated. :)
Vive le moose!

Because AG is no where in sight and people are still sending in baked goods even though the deadline was oh so 2007, I am going to declare a winner to whomever can tip my blog comments over a magical number. Yes, that's right. I need comments people! My blog, humble though it may be, is approaching a magical number. If your comment is the one to make it reach that elusive place, you win. End of story.

There will be no limit to the number of comments one may leave on any given day. There may be special awards given for the number of times "moose" can be worked into any given comment. There may be awards given the comment that makes me spit my coffee out the most number of times.

Let me hear you people!! There's a crown to be had, dammit!

The cookie is still crumbling...

Yeah, I know, I know... we're officially in 2008... cookie season is supposed to be over, but apparently it's not. This judge has received a few boo-hoo e-mails from some distraught bake-off entrants (3 to be exact) who for any number of reasons, were not able to get the goods to us in time. While I would love to confer with my fellow judge, AG... I don't know where in the hell she is. For all I know she's passed out somewhere in Napa Valley. I don't even know which coast she's on. She could very well be stuck in a deep freeze on the east coast. SO... that having been said, I am inclined to let those who sent goods, but whom the postal gods f***ed with, re-send.

I believe AG handed down some judging deadline of January 15th... Grizzled and I were finished oh so long ago, but again, who am I to spar with the reasoning of AG. It's only January 4th... if you whiners, you postally-challenged bakers, can get the goods to us by the 11th, you'll be considered. You're going to have to send something pretty darn spectacular though since you'll be docked 7 points from the get-go for lateness. Why 7? I don't know why. I just like the number and if you complain about that, I'll make it 10. It just wouldn't be fair to those who baked and got things here on time if you weren't docked.

Decisions WILL BE MADE by the 15th though. Corn Man wants a new home and frankly, I'm ready for Corn Man to find a new home. He still freaks me out. I even had to move him to an upper shelf so the dog would stop barking at him. This whole year has been one Karen Black "Trilogy of Terror"!!!

AG... if you're out there... send up a signal!

Calling all commenters!!!

Tonight Project Runway live-blogging will continue! It's a new episode! Tonight's challenge consists of raiding a candy store and using the ill-gotten booty to create couture! This kind of challenge is one of PR's best. It brings out the fun, it brings out the ugly, it brings out the tears. Don't miss it! You haven't lived until you've seen Ricky cry.

Yes, it's Project Runway live blogging over at newcritics! Commenters are welcome, especially since my live-blogging cohort will be in transit. I could use the company. Seriously. You don't even need a television. Ask Snag! He showed up for the first episode, wasn't near a television, and yet had some of the most apropos comments of the evening.

Come on... it'll be fun. The holidays are over after all, what else have you got to do?

Bravo's Project Runway, 10Easter/9Central. Live-blogging over at newcritics with commentary in the comments of course!

Bake-Off Entry Index

Here's a list of links for all bake-off entries received so far. Take a look, entries may have been missed in all of the holiday/vacation folderol. Going backwards in the order in which they were received:

9) Kathleen
8) Billy Pilgrim/Zelmo
7) Mendacious D
6) Pinkp Punko/Geenie Cola
5) Snag/Snag, Jr.
4) Brando/TLB
3) Team Chicago
2) Claire
1) Mandos
 

We give you... KATHLEEN!!!

Our last entry... or last as of right now... Chuckles is still having UPS problems. His cookies are stuck in outer Tuckercarlstan... and there are still rumors that midniter is baking, but I have yet to see anything and technically, the 21st has come and gone SOOOOOOOO... let's get back to our last entry in hand. KATHLEEN!!!!

Kathleen sent a lovely environmentally-sound package. There were no bells and whistles, only a promise that the earth had been respected during her packaging. No trees were cut down. My inner druid loves that. There were also no bribes. Although there has been a lot of talk about the importance of bribes, Kathleen knows I dance to the beat of a drummer that has integrity, baby! Score one for Kathleen. Kathleen also uses her first name while blogging. Score two for Kathleen! Kathleen, although sweet, can also verbally kick most any blogger around the block and back. Score even more for Kathleen!!!

But, this is a bake-off, not a word-off, let's get down to brass cookies, shall we?? Kathleen sent two varieties, one of which is shown on the left. Ignore the environmentally-sound cutting board. Yes, it needed to be thrown... I mean throne (sorry, BG) out years ago, but this was a free-range cutting board and Kathleen felt it would be irresponsible to pluck another one out of nature. She's sticking with what she's got, cuts and scratches be damned!

On the cutting board are some very delicious oatmeal cookies that had coconut, chocolate chips and orange! Grizzled and I both loved them. We wanted more. We're both fond of the chocolate/orange combo so this was a hit. Add to that, the coconut and I think, nuts... and you've got a winner. I should know if nuts were in this, but frankly, I've tested so many cookies that they're all running together in one gigantor Zelmo concoction! I must confess, for some reason eggnog sounded good this holiday season... spiked eggnog and I've probably had more than I should. As my eldest lamblet said, I'm probably suffering from egg noggin. She's probably right. However... whether they had nuts or not is beside the point. We liked them. We ate them. They were a wonderful combo.

The second cookie that Kathleen sent was some little ginger wonder that I still can't quite figure out. It was a rolled cookie that was sliced. It was not overly decorative, not overly sweet, but was loaded with chunks of mouth-warming ginger. Kathleen may not have realized it, but this little baby was the perfect ending to 10 days of non-stop cookie sampling. Our stomachs were feeling a tad sheepish. Come to think of it, that could have been the eggnog. Our taste buds were nearly tapped out, but this deceptive cookie was the answer to our cookie prayers. If there is a Cookie Jesus, Kathleen is it. Ginger is known for its stomach-soothing effects. The mellowness of the cookie combined with the calming and warming ginger made us reeeeeeally like this one. Not all cookies need to smack you over the head with SWEAT! Again, we liked it.

We liked both cookies that Kathleen sent. We like the fact that she shows of a sense of responsibility towards Mother Earth. Kathleen is a good cookie in our book.

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, Kathleen's entry is the last one in our hands. Chuckles' may escape and find its way here and if it does, I'll judge it because it was sent on time, but until then, this is it for the cookie countdown. I will put up a post tomorrow that links to all previous posts in the order of their posting. I realize that with the interruption of the holidays, some posts could easily be missed. No cookie post will go unnoticed. Everyone who baked gets their day.

I must return to napping.