Words That Make My Head Want to Explode

Ok, I've confessed to hating the word, panties, before... gads, even typing it makes my face start twitching... but the word... or words that can potentially make my head explode??? Well, come to think of it, it's not the words themselves, but the pronunciation...

I heard this particular pronunciation on one of the Sunday morning news shows and let out a roar/growl so intense that the youngest lamblet spontaneously started to pick up her toys...

The word?

Strength... or length...

The pronunciation?

STRENTH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Lenth is just as BAD!

Even worse? Shtrenth.

While my less than crisp, clear esses have dogged me through my life (Your S is bordering on sibilant my dear!), it now appears to be ok to say sh for ssssssssssssssssssssss.  Adding the sh to the already mispronounced word is just rubbing salt in my wound.

I can't take it.

I can take many, many forms of pronunciation. I can find reginal differences to be charming. I can even deal with the occasional "matooer" instead of "machure" that I prefer. I could deal with the geomotry teacher who said, "mazeyoor" instead of measure. Lit-a-chure has been known to make me clench my teeth and need a moment to regroup, but strenth?? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST TYPING IT MAKES ME WANT TO THROW SOMETHING!

And it doesn't matter if I like you or not... doesn't matter if you could get away with any other infraction... strenth could make me have to turn and on walk away.

Even Elvis Costello, whom I dearly love, nearly lost me on this one... and I liked this song to start with... liked the song, loved Elvis... what could possibly go wrong!?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Yes... God give me strength to not stop listening to you Elvis!!! God give me strengggggggth to remember your scratchy voice drives me crazy. God give me strength to ignore.

Comments

[Jennifer]

Upon listening to the entire song again, I realized he throws a little "g" my way in the end. That must have been what allowed me to forgive...

[Miss Jane]

Amen!!

[herr doktor bimler]

Ameng.

[Jennifer]

Hi Miss Jane!

hdb- ameng ingdeed!

[ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®©]

I suppose there's no need to ask about spiders wearing panties.
~

[Jennifer]

No link, thundra?? I thought surely you had found a funnel spider that had woven some panties with extra-strenth spiderwebs...

I now fully expect fish to photoshop a spider wearing panties. That's fine... just as long as the spider isn't saying "panties" or "strenth".

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

Besides 'Nukuler' you mean?

...when I took the archy license exam, the head proctor had a verrrrryyyyy slowwwwww speakingggggg styllllllllllllle. And he obviously wanted to make sure we hear every last syllable.... but then he started describing how to fill out the computer forms, you know the ones, where you fill in the circles. He would tell us to fill in one circle in the first COLUME, then the second COLUME.... I was ready to slap the colume out of his head by the time he let us start the test.

[Jennifer]

Damn... I should have entitled this "Word Pronunciations That Make Me Go Nukuler".

LOL@colume!!! Reminds me of a history instructor who spoke of Post and Lintel construction, but said, "Post and Linteel". I bet he was also a fan of the buildings with columes.

[ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®©]

Will you be watching the Hyperbowl?
~

[Jennifer]

LOL!!! I can't even stand to look at his pouty, pouty face, let alone listen to what comes out of it.

[Mandos]

You have a category called "Feel the Moisture." How would you feel if I told you that I've decided to pronounce it "Feel the Moistoor"?

It's an accent thing. The "ngth" consonantal cluster is actually kind of weird if you think about it. I can say it, but my immigrant-from-Asia-but-completely-fluent-in-English relatives often have trouble with it. Urdu has an "ng", but not an "ngC" where C is a consonant that uses the tip of the tongue. I'm betting even some English dialects simply don't have that.

[Jennifer]

Mandos- you may say moisture anyway you like on this blog!

I generally don't "judge" pronunciation differences and am sure I commit enough atrocities of my own with my native tongue, I'd hate to think of what I'd do to other languages, not having practiced them since birth, but strenth is just one that hits me on a very visceral level.

[Jennifer]

And... I don't care how you pronounce it... I'm never going to like panties!!! And... there will never be a panties category on this blog...

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

a history instructor who spoke of Post and Lintel

Tell him that the proper term would be Post and Beam.

It's more genteel.

[karla]

Ah, the mention of teachers reminds me of my high school sociaology teacher (also the football coach, Jen) who told us about the 'modamic tribes',

The slight 'sh' that precedes t's now in the pronunciation of many - especially many girls the age of my daughter irritates me. Strawberry becomes shtrawberry. It is subtle and it is contagious and it is interesting to have watched it proliferate.

[Jennifer]

(also the football coach, Jen)

Oh! I think I remember him... was he the one who called everyone "Tiger", right?

Yes, that is exactly the sh/s thing I'm talking about... it is with the s when it comes before a t. Grrrrrr. When I think of how hard I tried to clean up my S's and now it's ok, it frosts my arse!

[herr doktor bimler]

a history instructor who spoke of Post and Lintel
I mentally mispronounced that as "lentil", and immediately imaged ZRM using this form of construction to design a dining hall.
It would be a mess of pottage.

[Jennifer]

Wait... I believe the mention of lentils is taking us full circle to a comment of yours over at fish's... I can't find it now. fish gets too many comments to make it easy to find one.

You've got lentils on the brain!

ZRM- have you ever worked in lentils?

[Dan Leo]

I don't like the p-word either, and I don't know why. Speaking of p-words, another one that bugs the hell out of me is one you never used to hear before twenty years or so ago, and then it entered the language with a vengeance because people thought it made them sound kind of smart and because it sounded like "perimeters": the dreaded "parameters".

[Another Kiwi]

Eat your Pottage before it grows moldy. There is not much worse than Hairy Pottage.
Whilst employed by Coca-Cola bottlers in Melbourne town, I attended several union members which caused my severe mental pain. The head dude would talk to us and call us all "youse" the collective noun for CC workers it seemed. My colleagues said that I winced every time he used the word. Seriously life threatening.

[Jennifer]

I don't like the p-word either, and I don't know why.

Dan- I believe we have discussed our mutual dislike for the p-word... I know mine stems from the way people say it... they just get a different look and a different tone and I want to yell, "GACK!"

AK- Hairy Pottage. Dear. Lord. Sounds like a symptom... something to be solved by buying something from a late night infomercial.

"Do you suffer from Hairy Pottage??"

And, I shall refrain from any use of youse...

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

ZRM- have you ever worked in lentils?

No, but I know an artist who glued a bunch of them to one of her walls....

[blue girl]

My choir teacher pronounced schedule -- sheduel. Hard to type it the way he said it. And it's not that it bugged me the way he pronounced it per say (yes! per say!) but that he only pronounced it that way to sound smart. Ick blech blick!

I don't like the way some Americans take on a different culture's way of saying things, trying to impress people.

[mdh]

Cool hWhip? What the hell is Cool hWhip?

[herr doktor bimler]

to design a dining hall.
You know what the final blueprint would be called? A galley proof.
I'll go now.

[Jennifer]

BG- ZRM is going to be on your for your per se... just sayin'. :) Sheduel at least sounds British and doesn't bother me although I'd never say it without giggling.

I am so lost with mdh's Cool Whip... who brought the Cool Whip?

A galley proof LOL!

[Jennifer]

DUH!!! The minute I posted the damn comment, Stewie popped into my head... I am no longer lost with the Cool hWhip.

[Another Kiwi]

Hairy Pottage is that magic boy

[Jennifer]

Yeah! That magic boy with an ailment! Or a bowl full of gruelly whatever, but with lovely round glasses... and lots of hair.

[Andy]

I had a junior high school science teacher who pronounced "similar" as "sim-u-lar"; I suppose that's sort of in the "nuclear => noo-ku-lar" vein. I've never heard anyone else pronounce it that way since. Also, I had an ex-girlfriend who always pronounced the "l" in "salmon", which might be something regional, but again I've never heard it anywhere else. (She's my "ex-" girlfriend now for a number of very good reasons, but that wasn't one of them.)

[Jennifer]

I like to say the "l" in salmon for fun, but I know better.

That reminds me of people who pronounce the "t" in often. I don't, but that might be regional as well.

[Mandos]

I'm told that I actually *do* sometimes say "about" as "aboot". Really, "abo-oot", but quickly.

[Jennifer]

Aboot always made me kind of smile.

[Substance McGravitas]

In the vanities
No one wears panities.

--Ogden Nash

[Another Kiwi]

Some years ago I posted the lyrics to the famous Kiwi song "There is no Depression in New Zealand" on a forum that had a large percentage of American posters. The lines include:these
here is no depression in New Zealand;
there are no sheep on our farms,
There is no depression in New Zealand;
we can all keep perfectly calm,

I got an interesting message from a fellow poster who said "Only a kiwi would rhyme, farm and calm". It was a nice message from a genuinely interested person.
Is it because you say the "L"? We certainly don't. I wonder how it came about?

[Jennifer]

panities is only slightly better since it makes me think of manatees...

AK- yes, I would assume that would be it. Most of us do indeed say the "L", but I have heard Americans who don't depending on the region.

Do you not say the "R" in farm? The majority of Americans do, but again, there are regions that drop the R.

[ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®©]

Faaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmm.

Caaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmm.

He typed, sheepishly.
~

[herr doktor bimler]

In that connection, have any of your Fox presenters gone the whole Savonarola route yet and issued a call to public repentance? I kinda like the idea of a Bonfire of the Hannities.

[Another Kiwi]

Yes, Mr Thunder is correct in that we, mostly , don't say the "R". some parrrrrts of the South Island do, however. Show-offs.

[almostinfamous]

i only say 'strength' when i consider it - mostly it goes out as strenth... laziness? i dont know...

i say farm, i dont say calm, i say kahm, and people always look at me when i say saLmon, instead of sammun.

separated by a common language!

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

I pronounce it Throat-warbler-mangrove.

[Jennifer]

LOL@ Throat-warbler-mangrove...

AND Bonfire of the Hannities! We could only hope.

aif- if you say.... strenth... well then it has to be ok... even if painful. :)

[almostinfamous]

as i said, if i am focussing - it's strength, but in the middle of a conversation - it goes back to strenth. and strangely, i was observing this all day thanks to your post:)

[Jennifer]

:)

[fish]

I believe it is pronounced arsh.

[fish]

I don't have any spiders in panties, but I do have one in stubbies.

[fish]

And as usual, the prime rule of the internets still applies.

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

I don't think that qualifies as Helping Jennifer, fish.

[zombie rotten mcdonald]

God give me strength to not stop listening to you Elvis!!!

To be fair, that was from his collabo with Bacharach.... I even removed that album from my iPod to make room, and I'm a BIG old elvis fan.

[Jennifer]

I don't think that qualifies as Helping Jennifer, fish.

NO!! IT DOES NOT!!

OH. MY. GOD!!!!!!! I can't believe I clicked. I fully expected fish to unleash the stubby, but DEAR. LORD!!!

ZRM- I confess to liking teh Bacharach... left over from my father liking him and playing his tunes often while I was growing up. I even have the Elvis/BB CD. Not as horrifying as that image that fish unleashed... just for that, I'm loading up the Celine bazooka.