Behold! The Snacktator!!!
Updated below-
Back in December, I was directed to a post over at 3 Bulls! It was entitled "Snack Cake Dictators". It (with ensuing comments) was one of the funniest things I've read in a long time. I snorted, I cried, I had to take a break and go back for more.
Ever since I read that post, I have had visions in my head. Anyone who has been here for any length of time knows I must *animate* things if you will. Well, this past weekend, my initial vision of Snacktator came to life. I was thinking of calling him "Eatie", but maybe "Snacktator", Dictator of all Snack Cakes, will suffice.
Pinko, this one is for you. :)
Although not as stunning and formidable as Snacktator, I am adding, Hirocheetoh.
I ate one of those a few days ago for dessert. It was totalitarianly delicious!!!
Ridiculously brilliant, Jennifer. Why do you mock our half-assedness?
Posted by: The Uncanny Canadian | February 19, 2007 at 05:06 PM
The only think that could one notch up that into universe destroying insanity is if he had a little skinny monkey butt in back.
Are you trying to breathe life into our dying blog bodies? How can you do this to us? I know we promised to pinm a Take 5, but we are half-assed!
This is so amazing.
Posted by: Pinko Punko | February 19, 2007 at 05:11 PM
Pinko- He may have a skinny monkey butt, but it's covered by his dictatorial duds. :)
Hirocheetoh didn't turn out as well. I may post him tomorrow. He has a skinny monkey butt face.
Thanks, UC.
Posted by: Jennifer | February 19, 2007 at 05:39 PM
I have this image of you standing over him, frosting knife in hand, shouting, "I give you life!"
Posted by: Snag | February 19, 2007 at 06:13 PM
Schmoopies, when did you have one of these? I thought we were trying to diet.
Just when AG turns her back...
Posted by: Adorable Girlfriend | February 19, 2007 at 08:26 PM
I have an even more graphic image of me eating the snacktator while he pleads for his life. I think I would save the eyes for last. Don't ask me why I'm so cruel to food.
Posted by: The Uncanny Canadian | February 19, 2007 at 09:51 PM
When the revolution comes, all Snacktators will be first up against the wall OF MY STOMACH, with nary even a glass of milk!!!!
Posted by: Pinko Punko | February 19, 2007 at 10:49 PM
Eatie Amin?
Posted by: Gregor Samsa | February 19, 2007 at 11:41 PM
Snag- yes, that sounds about right. I cried that out right before inserting the brain from *Abby Normal*...
Gregor- yes, Eatie Amin. :)
Why am I now picturing Pinko and UC having a food fight???
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 04:21 AM
HMMM BARUM.
I am coming for you, Tolstoy!
Posted by: Chuckles | February 20, 2007 at 07:10 AM
Jennifer, I am in awe.
PP and UC's food fight would be an ever-escalating war of mutually assured cream-filled destruction. There would no no survivors. Only crumbs.
Talk about a lethal injection...
Posted by: Mendacious D | February 20, 2007 at 07:29 AM
you're obviously taking the intiative with this whole queen of the internetz thing.
the line to bow down at your feets runs all the way over to india.
Posted by: almostinfamous | February 20, 2007 at 07:34 AM
Thank you, everyone. Thanks to Pinko for putting the twisted image in my head.
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 08:13 AM
It's the very manifestation we have all been fearing, all along. "You are what you eat and what you eat is therefore you" is mere tautology. But given the Snacktator, it's all too clear that what we eat, in fact, rules us. Eatie Amin is an unstoppable tyrant, creamy filling or not.
Posted by: grasshopper | February 20, 2007 at 08:33 AM
WOW. This is hilarious, and as UC said, brillant.
Posted by: Claire | February 20, 2007 at 08:44 AM
All Hail Jennifer, Mistress of the Culinary Caricature!
Posted by: Snag | February 20, 2007 at 11:19 AM
I must admit- though they are culinary caricatures, they are not made out of food, but are made out of Sculpey (polymer clay). The Snacktator is Sculpey on a wad of foil. He'll last unless he tumbles.
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 11:27 AM
That guitar you hear is my world being rocked, with a little extra whammy bar from Gregor with the excellent Eatie Amin name. Just absolutely filled with creamy awesome, Jennifer.
Posted by: Brando | February 20, 2007 at 12:30 PM
Thanks Brando- I did indeed hear that guitar today and wondered what it was. :)
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 03:06 PM
The thrown is yours for life. All hail Queen Jennifer! The things you can do with food are beyond amazing.
Posted by: Shayera | February 20, 2007 at 03:07 PM
Shayera- Thank you. That's very kind of you. I must admit though, this is not real food. I was going to use a real cupcake, but wanted something that would last. This is Sculpey. A polymer clay that hardens when baked.
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 03:12 PM
If UC eats it, it is by definition food, even if he poops out a completely identical Snacktator.
Posted by: Pinko Punko | February 20, 2007 at 05:20 PM
I always knew 7-11 would lead to our downfall.
Posted by: Kathleen | February 20, 2007 at 05:27 PM
"even if he poops out a completely identical Snacktator."
Ooooh! Is he like a *Thing-Maker"??
And, is this commenting Kathleen, the actual Kathleen from the original Snack Cake post? The Kathleen who was on FI-YA?!?!?
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 05:41 PM
If there were cookies with Snacktators painted on them would that cause some kind of world-destroying recursive food implosion?
Oh, for the good old days when we only had to fear sink lettuce.
What other Foods of Mass Awesomeness lurk in the heart of Jennifer?
*
Love to eat them Snackt'ors
Snackt'ors what I love to eat
Bite they little heads off
Nibble on they tiny feet
Posted by: plover | February 20, 2007 at 06:20 PM
Those are absolutely awesome. I'll bet if you made a set you could get them made and have Newbury Comics [or insert your alterna-music store here] to sell them. Just think of how much more jealous we would be if you were talented AND rich.
Posted by: mdhatter | February 20, 2007 at 06:21 PM
SINK LETTUCE!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Snacktator Action Figures! Yes! And special Snacktator Underoos for Pinko.
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 06:34 PM
the axis of snacktators!
i named them in the previous comment thread!
the idea is mine, so of course i'll want 5% for perpetuity
Posted by: almostinfamous | February 20, 2007 at 07:07 PM
aif, you did indeed name them before. I'll pencil in that 5%. :)
Posted by: Jennifer | February 20, 2007 at 07:09 PM
He must be stopped from gathering weapons of mass digestion.
Posted by: fish | February 20, 2007 at 07:44 PM